Feature Friday: Stacy Helm
Feature Friday is back again, give a big welcome to
Stacy Helm of House of Helm
I met up with Stacy for the first time at her mom support group that she hosts called Birth Scars. It is focused on moms that had unplanned c-sections – which I did not, so I was immediately out of my element. But Stacy had such an ease and relatability to her that my uncertainty didn’t last long. We chatted, waiting for the other moms to arrive, about life and family and of course…birthing babies.
It wasn’t until another mom shared her story of heartbreak over needing a cesarean instead of the natural birth center birth she had hoped for that I understood the “scars” part of things. “At least mom and baby were healthy” turns out to be the last thing someone would want to hear as their vision for how they’d be able to bring their baby into the world is dashed. I could see the real need for this group and for the ability to talk about experiences with other people that understood, whether your baby is a month old or 20 years old. Really, that’s what we all want, to be able to share our stories with people that can really understand us!
You can hear more about why and how Stacy became a doula below and check out her Birth Scars group the 3rd Saturday of each month at Mercy Birth Center in St. Louis, 3-4pm. See the calendar HERE.
Here’s the rest of the interview…
What made you want to become a doula?
I’ve loved all things pregnancy & birth since I was younger and always knew that I wanted to be a mother. Thirteen years ago I learned what a doula was when supporting one of my best friends during her pregnancy & birth, the instructor of our childbirth class was a doula and I instantly became intrigued with the profession. I toyed with the idea of becoming a doula but it wasn’t until I experienced my own birth and became a mother that I found my fire & passion for birth work. After twelve weeks of maternity leave I went back to work super part time and hated it. I was craving something more…something I was proud of…something humbling & exciting…something that would allow me to be home with my son *most* of the time. I sought out a local doula training and as soon as I sat down in the class, I *knew* that this was what I was supposed to be doing. I’ve been a birth doula for just under two years now and I’m currently in a one of a kind super radical birth & postpartum doula training course under the guidance of Angela Gallo, a world renowned doula & entrepreneur.
What excites you the most about your work?
The most exciting part of doula work, for me, is empowering women to really dig deep and find their inner power center…their confidence & strength and ultimately their primal state…and watching them become mothers, and fathers, for the first time. It’s such an honor to be a part of this intimate chapter of people’s lives and is absolutely raw & beautiful EVERY time.
What is your biggest challenge?
The biggest challenge with doula work is probably the on call aspect. Always having my bag ready to go, having my kids’ bags ready to go, and childcare lined up for all hours of the day because you never know when you’ll get called to a birth! My fiancé travels fairly often so it’s important that I always my ducks in a row. Someone to watch our toddler, someone to get our older son to/from school, someone to let the dogs out… It’s definitely gotten easier over time, but it’s SO important for doulas with children to have solid backup + support…it takes a village!
Tell us about your family
I’m mama to two sweet boys, Lars (2.5) & Ardy (8), and fiancé to their dad, Stephen! Our little family of four is loud & wild and keeps me on my toes! We love thrifting, music, traveling and getting outside when we’re not cozy at home in the city!
If you could pick anything, what would your super power be?
Hmmm….my super power would be the ability to fill people with confidence & happiness just by looking at them! Kids, teenagers, adults…self confidence and a positive outlook changes EVERYTHING and so many people lack it! Imagine how incredible it would be to be feeling funky, and I look at you and *POOF* you have a new outlook on life and suddenly filled with confidence to take on the world?!!
What one piece of advice do you have either for a mom that needs your service or someone that wants to start doing what you are doing?
For the mamas wanting doula support, I always tell them to hire someone who you feel an instant connection with. This is the most vulnerable & intimate time in your life and you need to feel connected to the person/people supporting you so that you’re able to trust your body and trust the process of birth. With a solid “birth team” mamas feel confident and empowered and are more likely to experience an overall positive birth. This goes for postpartum as well…the need for support continues, so having that solid tribe of support in place will empower mom during those first weeks/months of motherhood. For the people wanting to become doulas, I encourage them to dig deep within themselves….figure out their WHY…what sets them on fire…and then find a doula training that is aligned with their passions and their beliefs…a course that will teach them all that they want & need to know…giving them all the tools they need and setting them up for radical success.
You can find Stacy and House of Helm